Thursday, November 13, 2008

my favorite poem

Love After Love

The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other's welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

- Derek Walcott

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

weird wednesday

Sometimes there's nothing better than stumbling upon a spot to call your own:

It's a great little video rental store tucked into the far end of South Park. Check it out!

Monday, November 10, 2008

melancholy monday

There's a reason why Mongolia is known as the Land of the Blue Sky. A few months ago, I thought that the sky was so blue that it almost hurt.

I've been contemplating the sky here and concluded that it's just as blue. I just never noticed it before. How can I complain when I'm living in paradise? Sheesh.

Nonetheless, I've been full of complaints lately. For instance, this weekend has been the weekend of My Final Paper. The process is a labor of love: each word clings onto the other, like stringing pearls. I am so sick of it!

I've been in a bit of a funk for quite some time now. Mongolia alleviated the pangs temporarily. I know there are logical reasons for it, probably because small headaches are hanging over my head, things like:

figuring out My Future
writing My Paper
filling out the moral character application
signing up for Barbri
studying for Tax (which is the bane of my existence!)

I'm a list person. Lists make me feel good and productive and crossing each item off gives me a small thrill. Haha.

Anyway, I know I am sitting in a deep funk because I can't get G out of my head. He follows me around work, sits with me during class, and haunts my dreams. It's not a healthy way to live. Of course, I'm not painting a false picture because I remember how much it hurt when it was bad and how good it was when it was good.

There's a silver lining to the story: I'm lucky that someone loved me so ridiculously. I pity the people out there who can't or haven't or don't know how to love like that.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Billy's back!

Downtown San Diego, like any city, hosts its share of bums. Considering the pleasant climate, I'm surprised there aren't more of them hanging around.

Last year, my nightly ritual consisted of driving home, stopping at the red light, and sitting awkwardly while Billy the Bum leered menacingly and comically a few feet away. I don't know his real name, but I nicknamed him "Billy" because I thought it had a nice ring to it.

Billy was a short, plump man who always wore a hat and a weird smile. He made strange guttural noises that stopped short of whole sentences. He was generally friendly but sometimes became a little too aggressive.

I noticed Billy because he was a marketing genius. He carried a double sided sign: one side read "Dollars please!" and the other side flashed "THANKS!" He even changed the lettering from time to time. Once, he outlined "THANKS!" in bright red tape.

After awhile, Billy stopped waiting on the same street corner. He slipped from my radar. Other bums took over the territory but it wasn't the same. They didn't carry appreciative signs or approach cars the way Billy did.

Yesterday, I was walking to work and I saw Billy peeking from behind a bus stop with the same sign and the same demeanor. I don't know why, but it made me smile.

I guess you never realize how much you appreciate people and things until they disappear and reappear. Maybe I just crave constancy, even at someone else's expense. Anyway, Billy's back and I wish him the best.